Good Denim, Bad Women

connerxvx:

And shout out to the 25,000 that died while you were reading this post.

SHOUT OUT. THANK YOU ANIMALS.

(via baby-cow)

Ron: Is this all the eggs we have?

Donna: Yes…what are you making?

Ron: …eggs

Breakfast: Tomato, onion and cheese omelet, canadian bacon, bacon bacon and biscuits.

Master of Breakfast Secret of the Day: Slow cook your bacon, it will render the fat out and then essentially confit the bacon in its own pool of awesome fat. Then reserve a thin layer of that fat and cook your eggs in it.

Instead of attempting to use pickup lines/techniques, I think I’ll just start showing women pictures of the incredible breakfasts I can make should they choose to sleep with me.

Bojangles Biscuits

So I had a sausage and egg biscuit, egg and cheese biscuit and an order of Bo-tato rounds for breakfast this morning. Grand total nutrition bomb?

1,340 Calories with 774 of those Calories from fat

Guess what, kids.

A beautiful hangover breakfast of grits, bacon, eggs, english muffins and darjeeling tea.

If you are a good looking female, and you post a picture of yourself under one of my tags… I’m going to like the photo. It’s a simple system, and I hope you won’t find it insulting.

This breakfast thing doesn’t stop down at school.

Tomorrow I will acquire a taylor ham, egg and cheese bagel sandwich for breakfast. It will be glorious.

Tomorrow, my parents and I shall go to breakfast and I shall demolish a plate of the best corned beef hash, eggs and home fries in Central NJ at this place right here:

The Colonial Diner

They make fresh corned beef hash. It’s unreal and damn near impossible to find.

Look at that menu, savages:

I think my strongest argument for why women should sleep with me is the fact that I make incredible breakfasts.

My Brunch:

Bacon fried home fries with fried egg and sriracha.

With Samuel L Jackson, activism breakfast. SOPA and PIPA sucks. Jesse Marino Black Out 2012.

Breakfast: 3 eggs, bacon, ham, sausage, home fries, pancakes, coffee, orange juice.

Next, the world.

Eggs with sriracha, toast with mascarpone, bacon.